What if other people’s judgment and pressure has little to do with you?
Neurodiversity&
Neuronormativity
See my resources page for sources of information discussed in this section.
NEurodiversity
Neurodiversity refers to the many different versions of nervous systems and brains in the world. When a person’s way of thinking, moving, communicating, emoting, socializing, and caring for themselves differs from the established norm, that person is neurodivergent. As a therapist, I think it is essential to affirm the qualities and experiences of neurodivergent people while acknowledging the reality of neuronormativity.
NEuronormativity
Neuronormativity is the attitudes, structures, and systems of supremacy that privilege certain ways of thinking, moving, communicating, emoting, socializing, and care-taking over others. It says that certain ways of being are OK, while other ways are not, and allows or encourages exclusion, harm or pressured conformity of those who are different. I am dedicated to examining neuronormativity and any internalized neuronormative standards I might have unknowingly taken on by being a member of our society. I help my clients do the same.
Hyper-connectivity
Hyper-connective brains are a hallmark of neurodivergence. Think about the brain as a vast network of communicating pathways. The pathways of neurodivergent people are more numerous, unpruned, and have unique connections that are sometimes indirect and have to take detours. A neurodivergent brain takes in significantly more information than the norm. Because of this, it may get easily fatigued, overwhelmed, or disorganized. It also may be particularly creative, recognize patterns more readily, and make fewer assumptions, or overly rely on detailed predictions. Brain imaging studies reveal that although they are hyperconnected in different ways, people with OCD, ADHD and autism have hyperconnectivity in common.
*Note - research on hyperconnectivity is still in the early stages.
Monotropism, inertia, and Hyperfocus
Montoropism is the tendency to focus deeply on a few subjects rather than generalize. Inertia is the difficulty getting started on challenging tasks and the extreme effort required to slow down or stop when in a state of productivity or flow. Hyperfocus is a joyful flow state in which we lose our sense of time and become completely engrossed in something of interest. These 3 experiences happen often for neurodivergent people compared to others. I help clients use these brain modes to their advantage and learn to make transitions well.
The impact of neuronormativity
Internalized ablism, shame, trauma reactions, and despair are common responses to being neurodivergent in a world that sees their differences as inferior and communicates that accommodations are a burden. Many people learn to people-please, fawn, or engage in perfectionism to try and mitigate harm. Others isolate, act out, or develop other symptoms. I believe it is crucial that therapy with neurodivergent people support healing from harm, increasing autonomy, rebuilding self-regard, and supporting with self-advocacy and engagement in mutual aid.
Strengthening neurodiverse systems
A neurodivergent person, who is taking in more information at rest, who is facing neuronormativity, and who is recovering from harm, needs to have safe havens. That is why I work with couples and families to increase strategies, harmony and support in the home, and consult with therapists and organizations to increase affirming practices where I can.